Cleaning and cleanliness tips for these scary times...

Okay. Maybe they're not all that scary, but you got to admit, the news sure does have a lot of people in a panic. So, after seeing so many people on Facebook saying they haven't been able to find this or that in stores because they're all sold out, I figured I'd make a helpful post.

First:
"Oh no! There's no hand soap!"

Y'all! A bar of Ivory will do the same thing, even if it isn't as convenient as pumping that little thing on top of a bottle of hand soap. If you're worried public bathrooms might be out, throw a small bar in a plastic baggy and toss it into your purse.

Second:
"I can't find any hand sanitizer."

Grocery stores aren't the only places to carry these. Look at your local feed and farm stores, big box stores, pharmacies, even shop online.

Third:
"I can't find any cleaning products!"

I posted these before, but here you go! Household cleaner, disinfectant wipes, even glass cleaner! All-natural and does the same thing as any of those store-bought cleaners! I copied and pasted from the post a few years back.

3-1 Household Cleaner
(All purpose, Window/mirror, Air freshener)

1 C White vinegar
2 C water
1 Tbsp dish soap
30 drops of essential oil

I just funnel these ingredients into whatever empty spray bottle I have. I've been using a 409 bottle for years, but you can go purchase a new spray bottle if you'd like and just write or print out a label of what's in the bottle.

TIP:
I tend to use lavender, orange, or lemon in my cleaning products. But recently I started adding peppermint. Over at Housewife How-To's she said peppermint helps to deter mice, ants, and even roaches. I live in the country and I can tell you the peppermint has definitely helped with the ants! I haven't seen one in months!

Household Disinfecting Wipes (reusable)
Mason jar or some sealable glass jar (wide-mouthed)
2 C water (distilled preferably)
1 C white vinegar
Your choice of essential oils. My fave is:
15 drops lavender
5 drops lemon
5 drops Tea Tree oil
cut up squares of fabric of your choice. I cut up an old flannel nightgown, but you can use t-shirts, washcloths, etc.

Just put the squares of fabric in the jar, Mix the ingredients in a bowl and pour the cleaner over the cloths. You can just throw the cloth in the wash after each use. No more landfill waste, no more wasted money.

Window Cleaner:
If you're worried about using soap or essential oils on your glass or mirrors just use vinegar and water with a microfiber cloth.


Here are some sites with natural and homemade cleaning products that I love:
Houselogic - This site has a comparison of different laundry detergents and how they worked for her.
Housewife How-To's - She has great money-saving tips, cleaning tips (love her book on the 30 days to a clean house), and how to build a schedule among other things!
Keeper of the Home - has a ton of homemade cleaning products, as well as tips on housekeeping, children, cooking, etc.


Is there another product you'd like to see an alternative to? Leave me a comment and I'll find it for you! Keep those hands washed, cover your mouth when you cough, and please, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!, please stay home if you're sick!

Why can't I just relax?

Sitting at work today, I ran through my mind all the things I needed to do both when I got home tonight, and what needed to be done this weekend. You see, even though I'm officially back at work, I still shoulder a majority of the responsibilities at home. I have an adult daughter at home, but she's mentally challenged and can only help so much. She has a list of daily chores to be completed before I get home, but to be honest, I'm a bit of a control freak. I'd never tell her this, but the things are never done the way I'd do them.

I should probably hand over a few responsibilities to one of the other two family members of my house. There's the typical housework, home repairs, bills, yard work, errands, grocery shopping, meals, etc. But...that would mean I'd have to give up control.

What the hell is wrong with me? Why can't I release the power? I don't want to be exhausted every day. I don't want to do everything in the few hours I have each evening and on the weekends. I think there's this part of me that wants one of them to just jump and do them without me asking. How wonderful it would be to not have to ask someone to keep their items picked up. How wonderful it would be to come home to a clean house. How wonderful to not have to ask the husband to make the bed when he's the last one up or for either of them to put their dishes in the dishwasher after a meal.
Honestly, though, I'm not sure I'd know how to act if the household duties were suddenly equally divided. Would I even be able to relinquish the control? Would I ever be satisfied with how someone else mopped or dusted or did laundry? Would I know how to act if I could spend a weekend doing nothing instead of catching up on a week's worth of laundry and more or less spring cleaning every Saturday and Sunday?

Even when I'm caught up with everything, I always find myself a project, write more on one of my books, something to keep myself busy. I'm not even sure I know how to relax.

How did you learn to just be instead of always filling your time with busy work? Were any of you ever able to hand over the reins after returning to work?

Until next time, have a wonderful day!

Trying to get healhy!

I've been trying to get healthy for the past few months. Of course, the holidays put a wrench in my plans, but since January, I was back at it hard. I've kept my calories around 1000-1200 daily. Here's the thing: I haven't lost any weight. It's frustrating as heck. I haven't been going to the gym, but only because life is constantly getting in the way. I know. I know. That's an excuse, and I totally own up to that.

In the meantime, I have an appt with my doctor to have my thyroid checked. Every female in my mom's side of the family has one form of thyroid disorder or another. I admit I'm really hoping that's it. I was always slim up until my thirties. And then the weight slammed into my booty, stomach and...well, everywhere else. I wouldn't say I'm obese, but definitely out of shape and overweight. If the results come back normal, I'll have to commit to the gym at least four days a week and reevaluate my diet. There must be some sneaky sabotage in there I'm not noticing.

There's more to it than only wanting to lose weight, though. I'm not getting any younger. At forty-three, I want to feel young. I want to have energy and stamina. Part of my fatigue is caused by a vertigo disorder, but a lot of it is caused by my sudden sedentary lifestyle. Desk jobs aren't conducive to activity, after all.

Have you tried any safe diets? I don't mean things like Atkins or Keto, but something with real, whole food? I'd love to hear your yummy recipes.

Until next time, have a wonderful day!

Why can't they ever help?

I noticed the moment I went back to work, the rest of the household forgot there are chores to be done. I'd been doing them on my own for so many years, it's as if they all thought some kind of dust fairy took care of everything.

When I first made the decision to go back to work, I made sure we had a family meeting. I wanted to make sure they were all on board with my decision. I also wanted to make sure I wouldn't continue carrying one hundred percent of the responsibilities on my shoulders. They all agreed. Now, there is only one child still remaining at home, and she's my child (adult child) with mental disabilities. Still, she's fully capable of wiping down counters and such. And there's also my husband. Yet, here I am, begging for help, asking the other family members to rinse their dishes and put them in the dishwasher, etc. OH! Forgot to mention we finally got a dishwasher. It has been a lifesaver since I went back to work.

Perhaps I spoiled them when I was home for ten years. At that point, I felt it was my job. I ran my home like a business, complete with a homemaker's binder. Maybe it's time to make a new one and include the other two family members in its creation, let them feel like they had a part in planning and scheduling the daily chores. Since there are only three of us and two dogs, I feel the house should remain clean. I understood when there were five of us and no dishwasher. Not any more. A place for everything and everything in its place.

One of the things I've been doing in hopes of helping the DD and DH get on board is purging unnecessary items from the home. I'm hoping if there are fewer things to clean and put away, there will be less stress when I ask for help.

What ways have you found to help get the other family members involved in the running of your household? Do you send the husband with a grocery list? Do you divvy out chores on the weekends? Let me hear any and all ideas!

Until next time, have a wonderful day!

I'm baaaack!

I've decided to give this old blog new life. Soon, the title of the blog will be changed to Traditional Housewife IN the World since I'm officially a working woman. I work part-time selling insurance, do hair on the side, and I'm still writing books. I even have a new pen name for my fiction: Lynn Howard

I'm not sure what exactly this blog will entail since I'm no longer a full-time housewife, but I still have quite a bit of old-timey stuff for you guys. I still make sure I look presentable, even on my days off work. I still go by somewhat of a cleaning schedule so my house never gets away from me. I still use homemade cleaning products to cut down on the number of chemicals used in our home.

For those of you who stuck around, let me know if there are any specific topics you'd like me to cover. Are there tips for a working mom/wife/woman you'd like me to address? Would you like to see my new cleaning schedule? Would you like to talk about family issues that could arise when mom goes back to work? Let's have a conversation. This blog is about us, not just me.

Anyway, it's good to be back! I missed you lovely people! Until next time, have a wonderful day!

Changes are in the Air!

I hadn't planned on talking about this, but....I'm officially enrolled in cosmetology school! I start March 13. That's two and a half weeks away and I'm a nervous wreck. I'm wondering if I should chronicle my journey through school after over twenty years after high school or not. Of course, being a writer I have to research everything. So, I've been watching videos, reading blogs, and researching the crap out of this industry. I feel pretty confident I've chosen the right path for my life, and being as my daughter (and youngest child) is starting her senior year in the fall and turning eighteen in the spring, I think it's finally time for mom to find something just for her.

Don't get me wrong; I love being a housewife, but with the daughter always gone at school, basketball practice or games, church, my son always at work or friends, and my husband always at work, pinstriping a hot rod or playing in his band...I tend to be alone a lot. I'm ready to get out in the real world, start a career, make some friends, and enjoy my midlife! lol Yep, that's right. I turned forty in December. Can you believe it? Honestly, I don't feel forty. And hopefully, don't look it, either. (feel free to lie to me if you think I look my age!)

Anyway, that's what's going on in my household. I know I said I was going to try to blog more often, but honestly, I haven't had much to say, yet so much on my plate lately.

I'll let you guys know how school goes. Feel free to send me any questions you might have and I'll do my best to answer them as soon as I have a good reply for you!

Domestic Violence In The News

I had another post ready for tomorrow, but then I made the mistake of not only opening a news story, but reading the comments. Here the story for those interested in reading it. It's sad, and awful, and pissed me off. Oh, the comments probably pissed me off more than the story in itself.

While there aren't many details, the gist is a man beat his wife - and mother to his three kids - to death, then set her on fire. Her own father was the one who found her charred body. Horrible, right? Yeah, here are some of the comments that followed the story:

Look, I was in a very abusive marriage for over seven years. Many times I tried to leave. And ever time, he would apologize, beg for forgiveness, and promise to change. He never did. Last I heard, he's still beating his girlfriends. When I did finally get out, I applied and was granted a protection order. Of course, that didn't stop him from calling and threatening me. Did the police do anything? Nope. They can't. The order and law states unless he actually shows up, there's not much they can do other than calling him and telling him to stop.

Statistics show the most dangerous time for an abused woman is the first two weeks after she leaves. That's right, AFTER she leaves. It's terrifying. I don't think I got more than a few minutes of sleep at a time, waking to every noise outside, just positive he'd come back.

Those who've never been through domestic violence like to say things like, just leave, or if it was my daughter/sister/friend I'd xxx. You'd do nothing. Because, believe it or not, we actually love the assholes. And we don't want them hurt. Not to mention, we're grown women. I've heard other say "why didn't her parents call the police when they saw the bruises?" Because there's nothing the police can do without evidence. All she has to say is she fell down the stairs, or was playing football, or wrestling with the kids, or *insert excuse here*. Police can't just arrest someone because a third party said so. That's now how the law works. On the bright side, most states have instated laws that takes the option to prosecute out of the victims' hands. This was done because so many women were dropping charges, whether it was because they feared retaliation or because they genuinely believed the man would change.

My life did get easier, and I eventually married my best friend and love of my life. But, I still have those moments. I still cringe at certain noises and words. I still can't stand to read stories or even watch scenes in movies or television shows with domestic violence. But, my heart has healed, even if my mind and body still remember.

I've forgiven my ex. Not for him, but for me. I've moved on. I've built a better life for myself. But the scars will be there for the rest of my life. Just remember next time you hear a story or even know someone in your own life who is being abused, they don't always have the option to leave. It's terrifying, it's dangerous, and there just aren't enough resources. It's up to every single one of us to reach out to these women (and men) and let them know they have someone on their side.

Glamorous Housewife or Work at Home Mom?

Or can we be both? I strive daily to look at least presentable to my husband. The Retro Housewife Life once did a blog on this topic, and for the life of me, I can't find it. But the page is still beyond worth looking at. I LOVE Nicole's take on being a housewife.

But, I digress. There was a time when people truly believed we should be almost perfect when our husbands came home from work. Hell, there was even a song written about this topic. When you get a chance, head over to YouTube and listen to Wives and Lovers. In the meantime, here are the lyrics:

Hey, little girl

Comb your hair, fix your make-up

Soon he will open the door

Don't think because

There's a ring on your finger

You needn't try any more

For wives should always be lovers, too

Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you

I'm warning you

Day after day

There are girls at the office

And men will always be men

Don't send him off

With your hair still in curlers

You may not see him again

For wives should always be lovers, too

Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you

He's almost here

Hey,…

The song has been covered by several artists, but my favorite version is by Dionne Warwick. Anyway, while I don't take the words to that song to heart, I have to wonder how much value it has. Of course, any husband who would cheat or leave simply because their overly tired wife isn't donning a pretty dress and perfect hair and makeup doesn't deserve a good wife. But, have we become so comfortable in our marriages we no longer care, that we no longer try?

As I sit here writing this, I'm wearing makeup, have on cute clothes (although not at all vintage. Most of my vintage clothes are for the summer, and frankly, I'm freezing right now), but my hair isn't curled. I let it dry naturally, so my long hair is just kind of hanging down my back. Oh, and I'm not wearing lipstick. Why? Because Loreal's Infallible lipstick is NOT worth the money. It peels and flakes and ended up on my teeth within ten minutes. Grrrr. My favorite is a brand from Sephora, and the dang label is worn off so I can't even tell you what it is.

Man, once again, I've run off on a tangent. Sorry about that. Back to our topic. Looking good for our spouses....or at least making an effort. Yesterday, I had to run some errands and wore nothing more than a sweatshirt and jeans. Did my husband complain? Of course not. But, I'll show you what I would normally look like...

These are two of my favorite go-to outfits.

Even when I have to do housework, I try to at least look somewhat pulled together. It actually has worked to my benefit on more than one occasion when I got an unexpected visitor or had to run out the door on short notice. I'll post a couple more pics, but keep in mind, they look so good because my sister is a professional photographer. But these are a few of my favorite summer time outfits, as well.

This one was taken by Rutster Photography for a calendar shoot I was involved in.

Obviously, the hair takes a little more effort, but if you can get used to sleeping in rollers (I prefer the Pillow Rollers), the next day all you have to do is brush the curls out and shape. Seriously only takes about thirty minutes from start of makeup to end of hair.

The heels? Nope. Those are for pics and special occasions. Because of my arthritic knees and stupid plantar fasciitis, I can only tolerate heels for short periods of time. So, I wear Mary Janes, Saddle back oxfords, or even Chuck Taylor's.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, you don't have to spend a butt load of money or even spend hours to look good for the day. Hell, put on a clean, nice shirt, swipe on some mascara, and brush your hair. You'd be amazed at how your attitude changes for the day.

My Day to Day Schedule

Okay, now that I've posted my cleaning schedule, let's talk about my work schedule. As I said a couple days ago, I'm a writer. Which means, I work from home. Also, I'm recording my books on audio, so I can only do that when everyone is at work or school.

After stressing about never being able to get things done, I decided to make myself a day to day schedule. Now, don't get me wrong - I don't always stick to this one hundred percent. There are days when my mom calls and we head out for some thrift store shopping and breakfast. Or maybe there are unexpected errands that fall on my lap. But, barring unforeseen activities, I've tried really hard to stick to this to ensure there's enough time for everything.

Of course, this schedule won't work for everyone. Maybe you have toddlers that take naps at a certain time. Maybe you work outside the home. Maybe your spouse works from home or you homeschool your little ones. Whatever the case, make a schedule that works for you and stick to it. I've had to, on occasion, set an alarm on my phone to ensure I don't get distracted with one project.

This is the schedule I made on Photoshop and printed out. It's currently hanging in my Cave. (My little space where I work).

It's a little hard to see, but here are the time blocks:

8-9-:30 Walk, Breakfast, and Shower. In this allotted time, I try to walk no less than twenty to thirty minutes. This is also the time I make sure I look somewhat presentable. lol I'm trying to wear makeup daily, but anyone who lives in a colder climate knows how dry it is right now. Between my skin refusing to keep any form of foundation on, and my eyes constantly watering (along with my nose), I've had to adapt my makeup accordingly. (No liquid liner most days)

9:30-10:30 Daily cleaning chore (this goes along with Thursday's cleaning schedule)

10:30-Noon Marketing, Promotion, Emails. Okay, this was is a hard one to stick by because I get messages and calls throughout the day and end up having to run back to my laptop. I'm trying to break myself of it and stick to this time slot, but anyone who works for themselves knows how hard it is to get your name out there.

Noon-12:30 Lunch. Again, hard to stick by because I tend to forget to eat. I'd love to say it's a writer's curse, but I think it's a woman thing!

12:30-3:30 Writing Time! At this chunk, I force myself to sit at my laptop. I might not be able to punch out 3k words, but as long as I'm doing something related to my books, I feel like I've accomplished something. Even if it's editing or plotting.

3:30-5 General Housework. At this point, my daughter has come home from school. I use this time to pick up the house, vacuum, dust, etc. for any rooms not assigned for this day. The deep cleans are saved for their specific day, but daily cleaning is how I keep up on the tornado...I mean, family.

5-7 Dinner and Cleanup. This is prep, cooking, and cleanup for dinner. We sit down at the table every single night for dinner. And since we don't have a dishwasher, all dishes are washed by hand. On the weekends, however, I make the kids take turns doing them to give me a break.

7-Bedtime Family Time!!! This is when we watch TV, movies, talk, etc. It's also shower time for the daughter. Again, I try really hard not to work during this time, but since my husband sometimes works odd shifts, my daughter is on the basketball team and goes to church on Sunday nights, sometimes I'm home alone and use the time to work a little more.

10:30 Bedtime We can all have a good laugh at this one. Okay, sometimes I'm in bed by 10, but I rarely go to sleep before around 11:30. Between reading in bed and mild insomnia, I don't sleep well. Although, I've recently begun taking melatonin and I think it's actually working. I feel like I'm falling asleep sooner and staying asleep longer.

So, there's my daily schedule. Like I said before, this schedule won't work for everyone, but you can adapt it to your lifestyle. It definitely eliminates stress of feeling like there's too much to do and not enough day to do it in.

My Cleaning Schedule

As promised, I'm trying to blog more regularly. Hopefully, I can keep the momentum.

Now, while this schedule works for me, please remember we all have different needs, different families, different lives. If this schedule doesn't work for you, tweek it to your liking. Switch the rooms around. Alternate days. But, make sure you find a schedule.

Before I start, I'd be remiss if I didn't mention my favorite tools for housework. (I am not paid for these endorsements. These are actual items in my personal arsenal and I'm willing to post pics to prove it. lol)

I love this duster! It bends so you can use it on your ceiling fans and you just pull the sleeve off and throw it in the washing machine. You can find it here.

I bought the pack of different colors so I could use them for different rooms. I use green in my kitchen, yellow in the bathrooms, and blue is for dusting and polishing all the other rooms. You can find them here.

I used to run a housekeeping company and have used so many different types of vacuums. This is the one I ended up buying years ago and I still love it. I only have carpeting in my bedroom, but I can use it on my hardwood floors to get up the dog hair and dust particles that a dry mop would miss. You can find this here.

Okay, as far as the cleaning detergents, I make my own. I'll post the recipe for it below, but you can always use what you have on hand or your favorite store bought brand.

All purpose Cleaner

-1/2 cup of white vinegar

-Several drops of lavender and pepperment essential oils. You can also use lemon and bergamot if you prefer a citrusty scent

-1 tbs Dawn dish detergent

-Spray bottle

-Enough water to fill the bottle

I use this formula to clean everything, including my mirrors and windows. Used with the microfiber cloths, it won't leave streaking. It smells lovely and cuts through grease and grime as well as any store bought detergent,

On to the schedule:

Monday - Bedroom

Change and wash sheets

Dust all furniture

Make sure all meds and jewelry is put away and no clutter is on the floor

Reorganize the bottom of your closet (where all our shoes get tossed after a long day)

Vacuum/sweep and mop floor

Tuesday - Kitchen

Move all items on counter to the side and deep clean counters

Wipe off top and sides of fridge

Clean out inside of fridge

Wipe down outside of cabinets

Sanitize trash can

Sweep and mop floor

Wednesday - Bathrooms

Scrub down tub and shower walls

Scrub inside of toilet with toilet brush

Sanitize outside of toilet, including the sides near the floor

Remove items from sink and deep clean surfaces

Polish mirrors

Dust any wall decor

Sweep and mop floor

Thursday - Living/Family Rooms

Fluff pillows and fold all blankets

Dust all furniture (use oils is real wood)

Whisk/vacuum under cushions

Clean under sofas (where all the discarded socks and missing pens seem to land)

Sweep/Vacuum and mop floor

Friday - Outside/Office/Misc

Office - Sweep front and back porches (this is where most of the dirt comes from)

Pick up any trash in the yard

Water plants and weed (seasonally)

Office - Clear clutter from desk

Dust desk

Sweep/Vacuum floor

I also use Fridays for groceries and errand running

Saturdays and Sundays I tend to rest a little, but I still keep up on the general messes and dish washing. Since we don't have a dish washer, all dishes are done by hand. On the weekends, I make the kids help with some of the housework, including meal dishes.

So, there's my schedule. I actually got the idea from Nicole over at The Retro Housewife Life. If you haven't already, make sure you check out her darling blog!

All kinds of new things this year!

Last year, I neglected this poor blog entirely too much. And I apologize. Every year I write goals for myself, not resolutions, attainable goals. One of this year's goals is to update this page more often and find some awesome content for y'all!

As for the changes and goals for this year? Last year, I attended quite a few conventions and book signings. While I still intend on doing a few, I only plan on doing one that is not local and that will be CIL-Con in Mattoon, IL.Otherwise, I'm going to stick closer to home this year. Why, you ask?

My husband and I have decided to become foster parents. I'd done it in the past, but my license expired about two or three years ago. We'll be going through the classes starting this spring. We've chosen to do elevated needs, which can also be considered special needs. Since I've raised my own special needs kids, as well as worked with both special needs adults and kids, we feel extremely comfortable and confident. While previously I'd chosen to work with the teens, this time, we're focusing on newborns through six years old. Because I still have two teens, I didn't want the risk of any accusations or hardships on my own kids.

The only thing making me nervous is making sure I have everything we need. A lot of these kids come with little to nothing. I already found a toddler car seat, but I still need an infant seat, a booster seat, a crib, and some varying sizes of clothing in case they come with nothing. I'm extremely excited, and extremely nervous.

As far as my professional career, I still plan on writing. I figure I wrote when I watched four toddler boys, I can write with little ones living here. I put out my sixth book on December 30th and plan on putting out at least three more books this year. At least, that's my goal. I also plan on becoming better at marketing myself. I'm excellent at marketing for anyone else; time to work for myself just as hard. So, having said that, I'll be including links to my books on this blog, as well as my website, www.clparks.net.

That's all I have for you today, but keep your eyes open for new posts on cooking, cleaning, and being a housewife. After all, that is my primary job and I'm damn proud of it.

The Death of My Daddy

The information I'd originally given was vague, and for many reasons. At first, we were working with limited information. On June 1, 2016 at around 9am I received a phone call from my step mom that there had been an accident in Kentucky and my daddy was dead. I kept screaming "you're lying. No he's not. I just talked to him three days ago. You're f*cking lying." And then I began to hyperventilate and collapsed on the kitchen floor. My first call was to my husband who rushed home from work. Then my mom, who called first my little sister, then my big brother on three way to break the news.

The only thing I could find online was a tractor trailer driver fell asleep at the wheel, hit a tree, and the truck caught on fire. Imagine the images that floated through my mind. But we knew better. My daddy didn't fall asleep behind the wheel. He'd been in a truck since he was 18, driving since he was 21. He knew when to pull over, when to sleep, when to rest. We knew he'd had his third heart attack and died behind the wheel.

And then more information began to come out:

This was found on Twitter. Later, they would post a story containing my daddy's name, Jack Howard, Jr, as well as the name of the passenger.

But, we still had to drive the five hours to Kentucky to see my daddy's body before he was cremated because there would be no funeral (per his wishes). My sister, brother, and I made the drive to Louisville, KY. My brother had to hold me up when we walked into the hallway to see that my worst fears had been confirmed. I had tried so hard to convince myself that it wasn't my daddy, just a mere case of mistaken identity.

We've finally learned the full details of that day. I've talked to the passenger, who is thankfully going to be okay in about six months. He'd been sleeping and felt the bump strip along the side of the road. He looked up to find my daddy slumped over the wheel. He jumped up to grab the wheel, but was too late. The semi crashed into a tree, the limbs going through the windshield. The passenger was unable to get out of his door or climb over my daddy, so he climbed through the broken windshield, rolled off the hood, and ran to the road in nothing but shorts and socks to try to get help. He said dozens of cars drove past before finally a truck driver and a pastor stopped. The truck at this point was smoking. They were able to pull my daddy from the truck, but he was already gone. The coroner confirmed that he was gone before the truck hit the tree. It was a massive heart attack. His third.

There are details I don't wish to share, mainly because I can't bring myself to type them, but I will share a few pictures. I do warn you, though, a couple may be disturbing.

My brother in law built this cross, my husband painted it, my sister and I attached the flowers, and my brother nailed it into the ground. This is something I feared would someday happen as I begged him to come off the road, even offering to let him live with us. But the stubborn ass refused to stop working.

The next few pics are of my daddy's truck. The first is what it looked like, and yes, that's a dead owl in the grill. He was always sending me strange pics and texts. He had a silly and strange sense of humor (gee, wonder where I get it):

When the truck began to smoke, they pulled my daddy at least five hundred feet away, so he wasn't inside the truck when this happened:

My brother, sister, and I dug through the dirt, the burned ground, the gas soaked mud in hopes of finding anything that we could connect to my daddy, something that he'd touched. I'm currently wearing a washer on a necklace that was part of the truck. I would give anything to have something that smelled like him, but the contents of the truck were burned.

We held a memorial for my daddy on June 12. My sister made a video for the memorial, a tribute to my daddy's life:

I still can't watch this video without bawling. I'm having a hard time believing he's gone. I keep telling myself he's just on the road, he just hasn't called back yet. But he won't. He'll never call back again. There will be no more silly text messages, no silly calls.

During this time, I felt more alone than I ever have. In the "older" days, people would gather around the bereaved, bring them food, etc. Instead, I received a few texts the day of, had two friends who checked on me regularly, but that was it. There were so many times I wanted to call someone and ask them to bring food, or even just vacuum the floor for me. I couldn't seem to make myself get up. My chest ached, my body felt full of lead. But I was too proud to reach out for help. When I needed my friends the most, there was no one there. If it weren't for my sister, brother, husband, mom, and best friend, I don't know if I could've made it through this with my sanity intact.

The next time someone close to you loses someone, don't offer condolences and remind them they can call you if they need you. Go to their house, show up with food, offer to straighten up, feed their pets, whatever. Send a cheap bouquet of flowers or a card to remind them they're not alone. I'll never again send a vague text, I'll never again tell someone to call me if they need me. I'm just going to show up at your house with a couple days worth of food and I might even wash your damn dishes!

Am I JUST a Housewife?

I've come to the conclusion that I'll probably never work outside the home again. Between my daughter needing me accessible 24/7 (people don't want to hire someone with an unreliable schedule) and my inability to drive 15-20 days out of the month, not to mention no marketable skills (other than writing, of course) or formal education, getting a job doesn't seem like it's in the cards. But is it such a bad thing to be a housewife? Someone asked the question here, but no one really had an answer.

On a good day, I fancy myself Donna Reed or Doris Day. I do my hair and makeup, don a dress and apron, and flutter around my house making it beautiful.

It makes me happy. A clean and organized house makes me happy. My family drooling over what I made for dinner makes me happy. But being happy and making my family happy doesn't exactly pay the bills.

Since the day I stopped working outside the home (daycares don't allow teenagers, regardless of their disabilities) I've felt somewhat guilty that I don't contribute financially to our family. Sure, I sell books and even sometimes make more than a few dollars on my royalty checks, but that doesn't exactly keep a house afloat. But is the guilt rational? Is this something I've been ingrained with because of societal demands? What happened to having respect for those men or women who stayed home and ran the household? Why is it when I tell someone I'm a housewife, I immediately follow it up with "but I'm an author, too", as if being a housewife isn't a good enough "job"?

Saturday's Vintage Videos

For Saturday's post, I decided instead of vintage commercials, why not a couple tutorials? Here are two of my fave YouTubers! ENJOY!

Joan Hollway makeup tutorial (More 60s than usual)

Lisa Freemont Street has some of the greatest vintage hair tutorials on YouTube!

My Virtual Vintage Dream Board

Since I have no desire to rush out and buy poster board, nor sit around cutting pics out of a magazine, what do you say we build a dream board. I guess I'm strange because there won't be some exotic foreign locations or brand new sports cars on my board.

Oh, how I love these dresses, skirts, and shirts! I can't be the only one who instantly feels confidant, sexy, and strong the second I slip this stuff on! Nothing else feels as natural to me as the vintage look!

 I might just have to do some DIY crafts over the winter! How cute are these glasses??!

 So kitschy, but I've always adored the midcentury poodle statues!

 I NEED a kidney shaped coffee table to go with my adorable vintage couch, chair, side tables, and lamp!

These would be so freaking cute hanging over my reading chair in the living room!

This was so fun! I think I might just do this more often! Definitely has my creative juices going! Just imagine how much of this I could make myself!

Adding to my wardrobe, thrift shopping, and zucchini bread

I registered my kids in high school today. My daughter is a sophomore and my youngest son is a...*gasp*...senior. And to answer your question, yes, I totally got emotional! My babies are growing up way too fast! Where in the world did the time go? What happened to filling cartoon character and superhero backpacks full of all those cutesy school supplies? *sigh*

After registering the monkeys and getting the boy's hair cut, we shot over to Wal-Mart. I've been slowly adding to my wardrobe, but frankly, buying true vintage can get quite expensive. Soooo, I've been making my own. (someday I'll post Outfit Of The Day). Here's the pattern I bought today:

I don't really have any circle skirts (although I have a couple dresses with the fuller skirts), so I decided to remedy that! I haven't bought the fabric yet, but I promise to post as soon as I find what I want. I'll probably make a few at one time so I have a good variety.

Now, I should totally be fabric hunting, but instead, I'm utilizing the last of my zucchinis for the summer. (I got sick for over a week and my squash and zucchini plants died since no one was taking care of them!) I currently have loaves 3 and 4 in the oven.

Yep, four loaves of zucchini bread from one zucchini! Once those are cooled I'll make some more and pop them in the freezer. How awesome will it be on cool autumn days or days when the kids and I are snowed in to run out and grab some comfort food straight from our freezer? Of course, I made these loaves wearing one of my sweet aprons. (Man, I really need to start taking some more pics!)

On another note, my mom and I took the kids thrift store shopping for some school clothes (hate buying a whole new wardrobe because it's hot for the first couple months, and my daughter is growing way too fast to buy anything too far in advance!) Check out this sweet dress I got for about $10!

I know the shoes are hideous, but they're all I have other than black flats, black heels, black knee high boots, and tennis shoes! I REALLY need some flats in different colors and some kitten heels!

That's it for today! I LOVE seeing what you've been adding to your wardrobes! Feel free to share you blogs with me so I can go stalk your pages!

Housekeepers Guide To Saving Money On Cleaning Products....

I have never been apologetic about being a "stereotypical" housewife. No, I don't flutter around the house in my dress and heels, but I do make sure my house is as clean as possible for my family. Lately, though, I've been knocked onto the sidelines by an illness that just does not want to go away. Therefore, I've had some time to do some thinking and researching. Wanna know what I've learned so far?

Here goes:

We'll start with things such as cleaning supplies. Do you know the best place to purchase premade cleaning supplies? The Dollar Store! Yeah, any dollar store, Dollar Tree, 99 Cent Store, whatever is near you. Believe it or not, the price of a cleaning agent will not affect the effectiveness of the product! Trust me on that! The dollar stores are also the best place to save money on things such as personal hygiene items, greeting cards, gift bags and gift wrap. I would skip things like vitamins, though. You want to make sure you get the right balance, otherwise, your body will just dispel what it doesn't need and you're right back to wasting money.


Want another way to save on cleaning products? Make your own! Yep, that simple. I prefer to use things such as vinegar, tea tree oil, or even just plain old Dawn or washing soda to clean with. Baking soda is much better for your surfaces than, say, Comet.

Here's a list of my fave homemade cleaning products:

Liquid Laundry Detergent
1/3 bar of Fels Naptha (Zote or Ivory works well, too. Just nothing with moisturizers in it.)
1/2 C Washing Soda
1/2 C Borax

Grate soap and put in a pan. Add 6 C of water and heat until soap melts. Add washing soda and Borax until dissolved. Remove from heat. Add 4 C of water and stir. Add 1 gallon plus 6 C of water and stir. (16 C = 1 gallon). Let sit for 24 hours. Now, the directions say to use 1/2 C per load, but I tend to use more for my kids clothes. Maybe just a full C. I also use baking soda or vinegar for stinky clothes or sheet. BUT NOT BOTH! lol

Dry Laundry Soap
I don't tend to use dry soap because I can NOT get all the crystals to dissolve. But:

8 C Borax
8 C Washing Soda
2 bars grated Fels Naptha
1 C Pyrex Crystals
Several Drops of essential oil. (the smell doesn't stay after the clothes are washed. If you want the clothes to be fragranced with essential oil, but a few drops on a dry cloth and throw it in the dryer with the clothes)

2 Tbsp per load

Add vinegar to towels or soiled sheets

TIP:
If you line dry your clothes (saves SOOO much money on electricity) use vinegar in the rinse cycle to keep the clothes from getting stiff and crunchy while drying. The smell of the vinegar fades as the clothes dry.

3-1 Household Cleaner
(All purpose, Window/mirror, Air freshener)

1 C White vinegar
2 C water
1 Tbsp dish soap
30 drops of essential oil

I just funnel these ingredients into whatever empty spray bottle I have. I've been using a 409 bottle for years, but you can go purchase a new spray bottle if you'd like and just write or print out a label of what's in the bottle.

TIP:
I tend to use lavender, orange, or lemon in my cleaning products. But recently I started adding peppermint. Over at Housewife How-To's she said peppermint helps to deter mice, ants, and even roaches. I live in the country and I can tell you the peppermint has definitely helped with the ants! Haven't seen one in months!

Household Disinfecting Wipes (reusable)
Mason jar or some sealable glass jar (wide mouthed)
2 C water (distilled preferably)
1 C white vinegar
Your choice of essential oils. My fave is:
15 drops lavender
5 drops lemon
5 drops Tea Tree oil
cut up squares of fabric of your choice. I cut up an old flannel nightgown, but you can use t-shirts, washcloths, etc.

Just put the squares of fabric in the jar, Mix the ingredients in a bowl and pour the cleaner over the cloths. You can just throw the cloth in the wash after each use. No more land fill waste, no more wasted money.

Window Cleaner:
If you're worried about using soap or essential oils on your glass or mirrors just use vinegar and water with a microfiber cloth.


Here are some sites with natural and homemade cleaning products that I love:
Houselogic - This site has a comparison of different laundry detergents and how they worked for her.
Housewife How-To's - She has great money saving tips, cleaning tips (love her book on the 30 days to a clean house), and how to build a schedule among other things!
Keeper of the Home - has a ton of homemade cleaning products, as well as tips on housekeeping, children, cooking, etc.

Do you have a favorite cleaning recipe? I'd love to hear it! Just share it in the comments!

Recovered my page from the hackers! And an ACCURATE 50s cleaning schedule!

A while back (before I got completely hacked and locked out of my blog) I'd posted a link to what has been perceived as the cleaning scheduled for women in the fifties. I'm an addict for anything and everything mid-century. Yes, I know the world was sexist and racist, I'm not naive. But here's the thing, even though women were told their place was in the home, they took pride in their work, in their homes, their children, and their appearance. They strived to do the best job they could. But I digress (damn soap box). After scouring the web, devouring as much as I possibly could about that time in history, I came across This post. Over at The Modern Day 50s Housewife she posted a more realistic schedule. Here's just a peek of this post:

Morning/Breakfast:

1. Mom would wake up and just like we do today her first chore was often to start the coffee. She had to do this first because it took ten to fifteen minutes to percolate.
2. While the coffee percolated, she would often prepare her husband’s and children’s lunches.
3. Next was breakfast prep, and despite what we’ve been lead to believe, every day was not a big breakfast day. Oatmeal, cold cereal, or toast were all typical weekday breakfast fare. Big breakfasts with pancakes and eggs and home fries were saved for weekend days. In some homes, dad would eat and leave before the children woke up. And in other homes, everyone ate together. In any event, the entire morning breakfast routine doesn’t seem to be much longer than our modern-day counterpart.
4. After eating, dad left for work and children were sent to make their beds, brush teeth and get dressed for school.  Clothing was usually planned and laid out the night before so there was no debate.  They knew what to put on and any resistance to getting these morning chores completed in a timely manner would be met with a promise to answer to dad later that day, so resistance was rare. Mom would often be tending to younger children at this time as well as possibly making her own bed and tidying her own bedroom.
5. Where a 1950s mom’s morning really hit the time crunch that we don’t feel today is when it came time for the kids to actually get to school. Back then, a car or second car was almost unheard of. Mom had to walk the kids to school.  I think if I could change one thing from our modern-day morning routine back to the 50s version, the walk to school would be it. It was great exercise for everyone involved and is probably one of the reasons obesity was less of an issue than it is now.

Late Morning/Early Afternoon

1. Once mom returned from delivering the children to school, she’d often settle any younger children then she’d take a small break for tea and maybe listen to a morning radio show (usually heavily slanted toward wives and mothers because career women were almost unheard of).
2. Then the busy work of cleaning would begin. The entire cleaning routine involved about three hours each day.

Definitely head over and read the rest of that post. In fact, have fun looking through her whole blog. It's fabulous.

You've seen my posts about developing schedules for housework, and thankfully, this post -if it's as accurate as my grandma says - is much more attainable. I always wondered why I had so many unfinished projects. Then I realized - I'm a perfectionist. If something isn't done just right, I get frustrated and walk away, telling myself I'll come back to it later, you know, when I lost the urge to put my fist through a wall. But of course, those projects stayed unfinished. I just pretended not to see the big ugly orange swatch of paint, or the paint splotches on the ceiling from my awful painting.

Since I've put myself on a schedule, life has seemed just a little easier, just a little more manageable. All those unfinished tasks don't seem so terrifying anymore, so overwhelming. I've shared my addiction to Nicole Mathurin's blog and her awesome schedules. But what do you use? Do you have everything written down and planned out? Do you wing it?

My Daily Cleaning Schedule

While I would so adore being as close to a 1950s housewife as possible, life doesn't always allow it. Sure, I could disconnect my Internet, but then I wouldn't get to talk to all of you, nor would I get to do any research. Therefore, I've had to put myself on a pretty strict schedule (although I struggle every day to stick to it!)

For years I struggled with a way to stick to a schedule - I've even tried setting an alarm to remind me to do this or that. From all the posts, videos, and blogs I've read and watched The Retro Housewife has a fantastic series that has fit my lifestyle more than any other. Don't worry, when I say "series" it's only a couple of videos. I had to change mine up a little because, frankly, I'm a creature of habit. Monday has always been clean sheet day, therefore, I had to switch the Tuesday bedroom schedule to Monday. Little things like that had to be altered, but all in all this system is working best for me so far. So here is my day to day schedule. Some things are done daily, while others are once a week. I'll try to keep it to just bullet points for now.

Daily:
Make bed
Swish and Swipe toilet and sink (check out Flylady for some more cool tips)
empty trash cans
wipe down counters
daily dishes (after each meal. Way easier than having to do all of them at once)
sweep floors
feed animals (first thing before I even have coffee)
vacuum and sweep, and mop if needed.

I won't break down the individual chores for each room, but here's how I break up the week and avoid having to spend my entire weekend doing deep cleaning. Each room takes me approximately thirty minutes, and the rest of my day is spent on sewing, writing, and dealing with my Damsel In Defense business.

Mondays - Bedrooms
Tuesdays - Kitchen
Wednesdays - Living Rooms (I have a living area in the basement, too) and dining room
Thursdays - Bathrooms
Fridays - I tend to do my running on Mondays, so I allot the last day of the week to straightening up my husband's office, my "cave" (my personal work area), and the area where my daughter and I sew. During the warmer months I use Fridays to weed the gardens, muck the chicken coop, and any misc things that need to be done outside.

Like I said before, I got the basics of the schedule from The Retro Housewife Life, but I had to tweek it according to my personal schedule and family. In the weeks to come I'd be happy to break down what I do on each day, but if you really want a great place for printouts etc head over to The Retro Housewife's blog - she has the prettiest printouts, and even has some for spring and fall cleaning, as well!

If you use a housekeeping binder, or a cleaning schedule I'd love to see it or hear about it!

Vintage Cleaning and Household Videos!!!

I guess some of these videos may come off as sexist to some, but at this time in the world it was just normal for the woman to run the home. In fact, the woman was literally the CEO of the home and ensured that everyone's life ran smoothly. It seems to me more and more women are not just dreaming of returning to the life of a vintage housewife, but are doing it. I'm one of them. I've always been proud to call myself a housewife - aka, stay at home mom.